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biology jokes


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#1 mdfenko

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Posted 26 January 2009 - 10:33 AM

Biology jokes

A couple of biologist had twins, one they called John and the other - control.

***
How do you eat DNA spaghetti?
With a replication fork (you can also use your zinc fingers...)

***
A biologist phones his wife from his office and says, "Honey, something has just come up, I realize its not my field season, but I have to visit my field site for a week. So, would you pack my clothes, my field equipment and my blue silk pajamas? I'll be home in 1 hour to pick them up."

A week later he returned. "Did you have a good trip, dear?" his wife asked.
"Oh, it was just a typical field trip, you know, work work work," he exclaimed, and added "But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas."
"No I didn't," she replied. "I put them in the box of field equipment!"

***
Biology is the only science in which multiplication means the same thing as division.

***
A young college student had stayed up all night studying for his zoology test the next day. As he entered the classroom, he saw ten stands with ten birds on them with a sack over each bird and only the legs showing. He sat right on the front row because he wanted to do the best job possible. The professor announced that the test would be to look at each set of bird legs and give the common name, habitat, genus, species, etc.

The student looked at each set of bird legs. They all looked the same to him. He began to get upset. He had stayed up all night studying, and now had to identify birds by their legs. The more he thought about it, the madder he got. Finally, he could stand it no longer. He went up to the professor's desk and said, "What a stupid test! How could anyone tell the difference between birds by looking at their legs?" With that the student threw his test on the professor's desk and walked out the door.

The professor was surprised. The class was so big that he didn't know every student's name, so as the student reached the door the professor called, "Mister, what's your name?"

The enraged student pulled up his pant legs and said, "You guess, buddy! You guess!"

***
Biochemist walks into a bar in England and says "Pint of Adenosine triphosphate please barman"
Barman says " here you go Sir, that will be 80p
talent does what it can
genius does what it must
i do what i get paid to do

#2 Trof

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Posted 23 January 2012 - 02:50 PM

Didn't want to make a new thread for one piece of joke, so I put it here.

Two Serratia marcescens enterobacteria talk together.
"Have you met this Eta phage?"
"Yes I did!"
"The world is SmaI"

Our country has a serious deficiency in lighthouses. I assume the main reason is that we have no sea.

I never trust anything that can't be doubted.

'Normal' is a dryer setting. - Elizabeth Moon


#3 Trof

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Posted 21 September 2012 - 12:30 PM

Plasmid comes to a pharmacy and says: " I have a problem with a digestion."

Our country has a serious deficiency in lighthouses. I assume the main reason is that we have no sea.

I never trust anything that can't be doubted.

'Normal' is a dryer setting. - Elizabeth Moon


#4 vidhya iyer

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 06:01 AM

how  will auxin blackmail a plant? 

ans: I will shoot you.






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