8 replies to this topic

[DRT]

Do many other people have to fill in those performance management/goal setting forms that get human resource employees excited?  I saved time this year by cutting and pasting a series of Dilbert cartoons into the appropriate categories but needless to say it has found its way back to my desk from somewhere stratospheric (my manager was happy to sign it off).

Anyway, now I need to veil my contempt in 1000 words rather than pictures and I’m wondering if anyone else has some good strategies or guides to meaningless HR speak?
I have compiled a list of expensive training courses to place under “training and development needs”; and I was thinking of paraphrasing Schopenhauer’s discourse on the agony and bordom of will for the section titled “goals/action plans”.

[casandra]

Hi DRT,

The Dilbert cartoons didn't work, eh? It just shows how humourless and unimaginative those people are. However, if you do want them off your back (at least till next year), then you better switch German philosophers and start paraphrasing Zarathustra and his "Will To Power". Ambition, assertion, self-determination, life-affirmation...being consumed and burning up in your own flames...blablablabla.....a notch higher than Dilbert's but then they wouldn't know what hit them. Just my crazy cent....oh, and lucky for our HR, I don't need to fill up these forms....goodluck filling up yours....

casandra

[Maddie]

We do   .
Basically, I write a list of everything I've done during the last year, including conferenced and publications, then I give it to my boss and HE makes the evaluation. He has tons of people sign it and then he sends it to HR...who does't give a damn. We never get a raise based on performance anyway   .
A total waste of time. Or a stick to make people work?  

[Prep!]

In my previous organisation we had it.. they called it KRA (Key research areas)
IT was prepared in the start of the year based on teh cmpany goals and evaluated every 4 months and rated. And the final rating was based on teh entire years accomplishments and then resulted in teh raise!!! very rarely though all was dependent on the rating!!!
In my present one.. its a start up.. we are the ones making all kinds of rules... so right now we prepare a monthly report which concludes by the next months work assignments and so on!!!

[bob1]

Yeah, You need terms like "actualization of potential" and "delivery of effective policies" and "demonstrable continuous improvement", "management of change" is another good one.

Also... a New South Welshman with a tiki?  How dare you sir!

[DRT]

"demonstrable continuous improvement" I like that; it leaves open how fast the improvement will be .








Ka amio haere mai i tētahi whenua ki tētahi.

[bob1]

Kia ora.  If I translate that correctly you said you travelled there but your family stayed?  You certainly out-do me in Te Reo.  I really should re-learn the little that I once knew.

[5times5plus5]

I set my personal goals in the little 5x5p5 goal setting booklet.
It is always in my wallet and I review it regularly. It keeps me focused on what really matters to me.

Enjoy and success!
Ronny

Edited by 5times5plus5, 10 December 2009 - 07:27 AM.

[DRT]

5times5plus5, on Dec 11 2009, 02:26 AM, said:

I set my personal goals in the little 5x5p5 goal setting booklet.
It is always in my wallet and I review it regularly. It keeps me focused on what really matters to me.

Enjoy and success!
Ronny

  You mean that I should prop a surf board and fishing rod in the corner of my office to keep me focussed on what realy matters