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That's it.

Posted by Adrian K, 14 June 2011 · 13,696 views

My stipend was stopped 3 months ago, because the last research grant expired. Now I'm on my own, not funded, and I have to fork-out money to pay my semester fees.The next semester starts coming August, but I do not have money even to pay my next month room rental.I should have finished my project by now, however due to unavoidable situation (by those nonsense university administrator) which caused many delays in chemical purchasing and delivery, and thus everything was delayed.-----------------------------------------------------------My Dear both Boss, if you are reading this:I told you one and a half year ago to let me change my project; it is not progressing as we expected. We never have any experience in doing such work. There are no experienced collaborator. The project was restart from scratch for 5 times, yet we still came back to the same bottleneck: there is no method for us to identify the lectin, whatever method we had tried was failed. You can't even suggest me what to do next. You once told me:" you are not credible enough to do work on your own, yet" on my first meeting with you around two and a half years back. But yet you never guide me any hands on before, neither of you both, but you asked me to coach, teach and assist your other graduate and undergraduate students.I give an idea as my backup plan for graduation, but you disapproved it. I do it secretly, and when it was working, you critics saying it is waste of time and not your interest. After I had consulted many people and perfected it, you patent it without asking whether I want it to be patent. I need your help, as I need your fame & connection to ask for some samples for the assay validation which is not available locally. But after more than a year you still ask me "what is that sample for?". I managed to get a respond from overseas, I offer him a second authorship, but you disagree, and I don't see your effort in helping me to obtain the sample. You gave me reasons where I can't accept at all. I secretly deal with another group, yes, a group, your ally, you know them more than I do, and I managed to convince them to agree to send me the samples, without telling them I'm your student. The group are very kind people, they do not have any reasons you mentioned earlier to reject them. Their track record is even better than you. They even help me more than you do. Now, after all these craps was settled, however, you told me that it is just my "side project" and it will never become my thesis. Okay, but I had seen other institution had awarded degrees for such project.We are not a large research group. We have limited funding and instruments. But you still take in graduate & undergraduate students. 20 students now with 1 working PCR machine and 2 shaking incubators, no research grants. That's what we got, really. Do not expect we can do proteomics work here, you almost throw away my expensive kits and competent cells. Forget about columns purification stuff. You don't even know the professors from other department. Maybe you know, but you do not bother to tell me. Well, I remember deeply you once told me is very hard for you to "bow down yourself" to ask for something from others.My bosses,I remember I attended few real-time PCR courses sponsored by suppliers, but you shows me dark faces when I back to the lab. I had proposed to do some real-time work but you said it was not necessary. I had went for interview in few companies. Most of them do not employ me because I do not have experience in REAL-TIME PCR. I wondered what you had taught/trained me till now, except endurance. I do not have the "commercial" skills.Damn, you never train me after all. I was wondering why I was in your lab all these while. I made a big mistake.I just want to get my master and graduate. Just let me go. No worries, I will not going to become a reviewer to review your papers in the future. I feel happier to open a hawker stall and self employed as a chef.FYI, I just check and I have less than USD50 in my bank account. This is your graduate student.




Hola Adrian, actually your mistake was the integration in a group driven by a boss as your´s, but there are people as he is in all the fields of the life (shelfish). Your situation is really extrem, but you have to manage it for finishing your work and leave the lab, and get a new job where you can prove all that you are able to do,but with the adequate reward. I consider you as one of the most wise forers and you have been able to do your work whithout any help and working hard. I wish that this difficult moment will finish soon . (Eres un gran tipo). Buena suerte

Hola Adrian, actually your mistake was the integration in a group driven by a boss as your´s, but there are people as he is in all the fields of the life (shelfish). Your situation is really extrem, but you have to manage it for finishing your work and leave the lab, and get a new job where you can prove all that you are able to do,but with the adequate reward. I consider you as one of the most wise forers and you have been able to do your work whithout any help and working hard. I wish that this difficult moment will finish soon . (Eres un gran tipo). Buena suerte



Hi protolder,

I never thought people will ever read my blog... Many thanks for your kind words and support. All the best to you too.
Muchas Gracias. hasta luego.

Regards,
Adrian
You have it rough Adrian. Are you close to finishing? I hope you are, so that you get the degree you're fighting for. You seem to have a lot of initiative, as well as endurance, because you go and try and find alternative ways to get done. Problem is that your supervisors keep reeling you back in. But you have a big spirit like Ken (lol) so I'm sure you will pull through.

You have it rough Adrian. Are you close to finishing? I hope you are, so that you get the degree you're fighting for. You seem to have a lot of initiative, as well as endurance, because you go and try and find alternative ways to get done. Problem is that your supervisors keep reeling you back in. But you have a big spirit like Ken (lol) so I'm sure you will pull through.


Hi Rebirth,
Many thanks for writing a line here. I told myself to end everything this July.
Seems like you are another BLEACH lover... I rather put my "reitsu"/spirit on some thing useful.
Thanks for your encouragement.
Hey, I totally understand your situation. Esp that kind of institution you came from.

Sometimes, it's their selfish mentality that they do not want to share and get help from others. :angry:
I think at this point, you really should "negotiate" with your boss. If you can't graduate, she failed to produce a grad student. That would affect her KPI/ reputation as well! Why not just let you write up and graduate? That's a win-win situation.

All the best!

Hey, I totally understand your situation. Esp that kind of institution you came from.

Sometimes, it's their selfish mentality that they do not want to share and get help from others. :angry:
I think at this point, you really should "negotiate" with your boss. If you can't graduate, she failed to produce a grad student. That would affect her KPI/ reputation as well! Why not just let you write up and graduate? That's a win-win situation.

All the best!


Hi sanjiun,
Yeah, you all heard about all sorts of story (from others, not from me I definitely) about my institution, esp from my current department.
Only a Malaysian knows best about another. ^_^
Since "candle vigil had been failed. a rally is on going..." exactly like our political situation. Actually the negotiation had been done, but she do not really care much, and insist I do the impossible. That's the reason I need to find my own escape plan. After all, She had already become a Prof, she don't need that KPI either.

I need to move on with my life... I can't stuck doing my master forever ^_^.

p/s: Not sure if you know a senior from my dept, YongYK...
hi adrian hold on and hanh in der for a while . you might well understand all this is giving u experience to do trubleshooting better, and then its the same situation in every lab i guess . v r all sailing in the same boat


and thanks for writting the reply it reallly did help.

hi adrian hold on and hanh in der for a while . you might well understand all this is giving u experience to do trubleshooting better, and then its the same situation in every lab i guess . v r all sailing in the same boat


and thanks for writting the reply it reallly did help.


^_^ thanks for kind words, Debo.
I glad that my post helped you in your cloning work. all the best.
One of my friends, a prof, gave me some advice a year ago that applies to your situation: sometimes there is no good outcome, and you just need to leave. Don't look back, because your current situation isn't helping progress now and continuing to dwell on it won't help your future.

Have you contacted the guy I mentioned to you?

lara
hI Adrian,
Just keep going mate. keep going. You'll get there. I'm a 60 year old christian actually and its always good to ask.. if things don't work out.. what is in God's other hand! ..sometimes its better!
There's always blimin frustrations but you will get around them.

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